After Europe reflections

2023 was an unforgettable year.

I remember back in May when I just landed in Cluj, Romania where even just walking aimlessly on the streets was interesting to me. I was fascinated by everything that I saw because everything was different; the trees, the animals, the sidewalks, the buildings. It was my first time going to another continent, and also my first time trying a lot of things. Romania will always have a special place in my heart.

In some ways, traveling took me back to simpler times, where the only thing that mattered was the joy of being alive. Back at home, whenever I go somewhere, there was always a purpose. I would never be walking around aimlessly, especially with Singapore's heat and humidity. Back home, routine and responsibilities just seem to swallow up time, everyday seemed the same especially when the sun rises and sets at the same time everyday. The spontaneity of my travels was a huge contrast, and I loved it.

Couchsurfing

As a university student not having a proper job yet back then, I was looking for ways to not break the bank when traveling for so long. So I did some research and found alternative ways of budget travel, and it turned out to be an incredible adventure.

Couchsurfing changed my life. To invite a stranger to your house is no easy feat and I feel extremely grateful and privileged to be hosted by so many amazing people during my trip, to share their daily lives with a random stranger they met online. So much so that I flew back to just see some of them one last time before I head back to Asia.

Through my hosts, I learned about their culture, met their friends and went to local places in their area which made for a super unique experience. I went camping, cycling, hiking, cooking, bouldering, gaming, drinking, hitchhiking, traveling and so many other things with my hosts. For me to make friends and get comfortable, feel at home in a place 10,000 kilometers away and having to leave makes it even tougher. Now that I'm back in Singapore, I've also started to host people back in Singapore to hopefully give people the same experiences I had.

Hitchhiking

I've heard about hitchhiking before, but have never given it a second thought, maybe because of the nonexistent hitchhiking culture in Singapore. But ever since my first hitchhike from Marosvásárhely to Cluj, it has become one of my favorite ways to travel. While it might seem daunting at first, with some preparation and common sense, it can be a safe and exciting way to get around. It allowed me to meet all sorts of people along the way. Being picked up by truckers, soldiers, families, farmers... the list goes on, each ride was an adventure in itself. Plus, the spontaneity of it often led me to unexpected destinations and unplanned detours.

I still remember very vividly how I was shaking with excitement at the side of the entrance to the highway near Marosvásárhely, with a thumb extended and a piece of paper from my host displaying my destination. As each car passed by, I was smiling and sometimes waving at drivers when they motioned that they were not going in my direction. I still remember the very first car that pulled over. He was a university student my age, heading back to Cluj-Napoca's university. I no longer remember his name anymore, but still remember the things that we've talked about. We shared about our university lives, how he was able to borrow the car to drive as he was from a certain club.

Ever since that day, I have hitchhiked countless times, whenever I felt adventurous and had plenty of time to spare. Some rides were brief, just enough to get me to the next town, while others turned into hour long conversations and even great friends which I meet up with regularly after. All these interactions with strangers made each journey unique and memorable, even though sometimes we could barely understand each other and had to rely on google translate. I also found that the best intercultural exchange happens when two people that can't share understanding with words can manage to vibe to music and sing together.

It's kinda weird because usually I'm the opposite in Singapore, and I've come to realize it's a product of overcrowding, where I just want zero unnecessary interactions with people in public spaces. The constant presence of people everywhere makes me crave my own personal space and I start to see the people around me as part of the environment and not so much as individuals.

Urbex

Urban exploration was also something new that I was introduced to. One of my hosts from Hungary had a guest who was passionate about urban exploration and introduced me to several fascinating locations in Hungary, where I could explore old historical buildings and trains.

After that, my curiosity was truly sparked, and I continued to do urbex as I traveled to other countries in Europe. To me, the appeal of urbex is that each location has its own history, untouched by time and often overlooked by tourists, made each exploration feel like stepping into a living history book.

While walking through these ruins and forgotten spaces, it's quite fun to imagine what life was like when they were once in use. It felt as though I was connecting with the past, uncovering history and shedding light on parts of the past that had long been forgotten.

Some of the building also looked really beautiful, with overgrown greenery reclaimed by nature.

Reflection

Just a couple of my thoughts.

• Traveling became a rebellion against the meticulously planned days I had grown accustomed to in Singapore. Life was getting too repetitive and comfortable, but on the road there are more highs and lows which made it exciting.
• Humans are social creatures and sometimes you just have to be brave and make the first step to make new friends.
• For all the different people that I've met over the past 9 months. How many truly negative experiences have I had which would make me want to stop? 0. That has to be some sort of impressive record for mankind and the awesomeness of putting your trust in strangers... and some strangers who I’m happy to say are now great friends.
• I just love the familiarity of being in the same place after coming back. To see loved ones, family or friends. The same bar. That same street.
• My favorite phrase 传到桥头自然直. Been saying this since secondary school and it's still holds true. No point blaming yourself for the decisions you made, and it's interesting to see where a random path, stranger or decision takes you.
• Sometimes I think I gave the wrong impression to people because I was seeing all the good in Europe and complaining about Singapore like a true Singaporean. Even though we might not be perfect, we are still doing many things right.
• We all live in our own bubble, even more so for people living in the countryside. We just gotta make that bubble as big as possible and expand our horizons.
• Learning about other's cultures also made me interested in my own country's culture and history, as well as my own language and roots.

There was so many thoughts going through my head during this trip and definitely some I didn't document. Out of my 3 years in university, I definitely learnt the most last year. Sometimes I wish to redo it to make it better, be it interactions with people or decisions I've made, but I guess that's just life.

The best of both worlds

Europeans mostly have differing cultures and mindset, which I honestly consider a breath of fresh air. The one that stood out the most was probably the different approaches to greeting. We usually nod or bow, but they hug or kiss. There are many great things that I wish to bring back or start doing in my life, for example the work-life balance, cooking and sustainable living. This reminded me of Hofstede's Cultural Dimensions theory, something I presented during my exchange in Sweden.

When I came back all I wanted was to continue traveling but the societal pressures to get my shit together and work / buy a house / start a family were overwhelming. At this point I feel both decisions I could end up regretting…

But I found there is always a negative side to the positive. Always some price to pay for the decisions you make. That is why my new motto in life is balance, in order to create a well-rounded and fulfilling life. Striking a balance can be applied in many different areas:

• Having a general outline or goals when traveling provides direction and security, but also allowing for spontaneous detours
• Traveling brings excitement, new experiences, and personal growth, but coming home provides a sense of stability and peace
• Living a nomadic life, but also having a place to call home
• Having both high and low risk investments
• Daring to dream but also grounded in reality
• Being hippie and free-spirited, but yet also grounded in practicality and responsibility
• Nurturing relationships with family and friends while also making time to meet new people and form new connections
• Finding a job that allows flexibility for travel or setting aside time for adventures while maintaining a career
• Eating healthily and ethically, with occasional indulgences
• Balancing online privacy while harnessing the connectivity and informational benefits of technology
• Using technology for work, communication and entertainment but having periods of unplugging for face to face interaction

But, we only have so much time on this Earth, and once I'm done with university there's no longer a set path to follow. It's up to us to figure out what's our priority in life and also perhaps the reason why I find it hard to commit to things - there's too many things I want to do I'm constantly striving to find that balance. But we'll see how it goes.